What’s expected of you? Is it to be brave? Beautiful? Clever? Quiet? Hard working? Composed? Strong? Handsome? Level-headed? Balanced? To stand out? To not stand out too much? To be athletic? Thin? To be kind? Gentle? To never rock the boat? To be assertive? To command respect? To stay small? To be big?
I could go on. The above is not an exhaustive list and can include any number of things based on individual circumstances, families of origin, associations, cultures, backgrounds, religions etc.
Such expectations can feel exhausting, pulling at the fabric of our being, moulding and shaping us into people we can recognise, but that aren’t us; not really. These expectations can provide us with things to strive for, goals to attain, successes to claim, milestones to meet. But, at what cost?
Where are you? Where did you go?
I know it can feel as though you’re lost forever (maybe you didn’t get the chance to be fully there in the first place), but, you are in there, somewhere. That version of you that delights in whatever pastime, activity, creation that lights you up. The one that feels. The one that knows. The one that does more than exist and conform. They’re still there, buried underneath the expectations, the do’s and the don’ts, the should and should not’s, the acceptable and unacceptable.
I’m so sorry you have carried this for so long. So sorry that you had to. I know how heavy this can be. I see you. You can rediscover yourself again (you never really went away, only disappeared for a while.)
You can come back now. You’re more than welcome here.
The world needs you.
J X
